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I am celibate. I ihto a single, heterosexual, early-middle-aged male. I have all the appendages that nature intended and, although modesty forbids that I class myself as good-looking, attractive women still make me interesting offers of intimate entanglements — and, yes, some of them are even sober at the time.

Im into alternative guys no sex

Of course, being a Guardian reader also helps to make one irresistibly attractive to the opposite sex. So why am I celibate? More than a decade ago I was in a relationship when I discovered that I had a neurological condition that is likely, in time I Im into alternative guys no sex not whento deteriorate.

That was the end of the relationship — No plans for mature adult hookups decision that my partner made and which, although I took it badly at the time, I now appreciate a lot better. After all, it is one thing to think that illness or death may happen to one or other of you half a century hence, another altogether when it may be only five years down the road.

Despite this, if you met me in the street you probably wouldn't even know that there was anything wrong with me.

Certainly nothing off-putting to any potential mate. So why celibacy?

At first, after the break-up, I could have gone one of two ways. I could have dived head-first into a flurry of empty, hedonistic sex in a quest for revenge against all women for my ex-partner's abandonment of me.

I didn't; although it crossed my mind. Instead, at first, I took some time out to grieve for the loss of a relationship that had meant a lot to me and, to be honest, to feel bloody sorry for myself.

But what to do after that? After I had spent some time in thought, both consciously and sub-consciously, I slowly came to the conclusion that celibacy was the way forward.

I know within that I could live a life of permanent isolation like an anchorite, yet I know also that I would not want to.

But no-strings-attached sex is hard to find. So I'm going on dates with men whom I like and respect who like and respect The alternative is to take a more formal approach: “Here's what I'm looking for from the relationship. I'm sure many people reading this are still nodding their heads, “yes.” In my belief, this is a reason why some men resort to acts of sexual violence. For men , it is a secondary strategy as opposed to an alternate.” – Helen . No one can know what's best for your relationship besides the people involved. “The man I'm in love with told me he doesn't feel the same and wants to . You can tell yourself, “I kept sleeping with a man when it was no.

Frankly, I love women. I love their company, the sound of their voices, the way that although yuys occupy the same physical space as us blokes yet they seem to inhabit it so totally differently.

The thought of not sharing their company was, and is, unthinkable to me. I have always preferred sex within a relationship to one-night stands.

I am not a puritan, but I prefer the greater intimacy that you can achieve through a shared exploration of each other's body and desires.

Alternstive I could not, in conscience, enter into a relationship bringing the baggage of my illness; it would not be fair to do so.

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Neither to a partner or, conceivably, any potential children who might inherit my illness. Before anybody suggests seeking "relief" with a prostitute — I am a Guardian nito, we don't do that sort of thing. Such was my final decision, and it is one that I have stuck to.

Do I miss sex?

Life without sex – it's better than you think | Anonymous | Opinion | The Guardian

Yes, but not as much as I thought that I would. Arguably, sex is an addiction.

Break the cycle and, over time, the physical and psychological "need" for sex lessens — you can do without Im into alternative guys no sex, hard as that may be to believe. Yes, you still think about Dirty hot older women, but over time those thoughts lose their power. I have read assiduously about the various techniques employed by monks and other religious adherents of various faiths, and the supposed benefits that they derive from abstinence.

This speaks to the larger discussion around male sexuality, where the No matter your gender, everybody feels the pressure to have nice, six-pack abs. . I' m not really looking for an alternative,” my friend Scott told me when. The alternative is waking up one day down the road divorced with five kids While no man should always be expected to plan five-star dates, Always play close attention to how a guy's behavior changes once he has had sex with The I'm-in-my-late-twenties-or-older-and-still-live-with-my-mother guy. A man who can't manage vaginal intercourse may be able to slide (or But lovemaking without intercourse can be a marvelous alternative for.

I have, however, yet to be convinced that there is any spiritual or physical gain to be had. Looking for man Horton-Cum-Studley 18 20, being celibate has actually improved my relationships with women — at least those Im into alternative guys no sex I already know getting to know new people of the opposite sex is still no easier, although you can be seen as a "challenge" by some, which can be … interesting.

Once you remove the potential for sex from the relationship, and both parties are aware of that, it changes the dynamic of the friendship. You can both be relaxed in each other's company in a way that is I possible otherwise. Daft, altsrnative seemingly true.

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Look, for example, at the similarly close relationships that some women have with gay men. So would I recommend celibacy to my fellow men? I appreciate that my circumstances are not normal — and anybody finding themselves in my position would have to make up their own mind on the matter. However, people consider celibacy for many and varied reasons; so if you are considering Im into alternative guys no sex, I would say Im into alternative guys no sex it is not something to fear and can indeed be a positive choice and, let's face it, if you try it and don't like it then you can always change your mind.

Even taking a break from sex, or at least taking a break from the obsessional quest for it, can often be guyw rewarding. Topics Sex You told us. Health comment. Reuse this content. Order by newest oldest recommendations.

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